Hey Taylor, remember when you had the best hair I’d ever seen and I wanted to be you? Well guess what, WE’RE DONE.
It is not the critic who counts;
not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who...
Lunch has been cancelled today due to lack of...
Deal with it.
Ever since I was little, I've kind of thought that...
WELP. SAW TITANIC TONIGHT.
Boys becoming men
men becoming wolves
The douches at Scovill
Overheard around 11:30 pm last night: [[MORE]] “I could never be a teacher because I’d have sex with my students” “Dude, is that jungle juice in your water bottle?” “You know it. I can’t be sober anymore, for real.” “I have a photographic memory.” “Seriously, dude?” “Yeah. Like I can remember exactly what the...
Last night I had a dream that I was kayaking but...
I also woke up covered in bruises and body paint. For the millionth time this semester.
Don't bother reading this post, y'all. It's more...
I’ve been dieting for a while now. I say that with reluctance because I’ve packaged the diet in with a few other things so I could call it by the much more appetizing term, “lifestyle change.” Diets fail, you see. Lifestyle changes do not. If anything changes, you’re successful. I’m gonna talk about it for a while. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8Y9-JlSRXw ...
Hey. Hey, Cute Boy at the party. Look over here.
How have you not noticed that I’ve known the words to every song you’ve chosen tonight?? Every time you turn off Ke$ha and play something else, I get excited and expect to have at least a silent moment of “Look at us! We’re the only ones here cool enough to know this band!” Seriously, I know you think you’re the only person enjoying this but DAMMIT I’M...
Someone needs to explain to Forever 21 that love...
Then that person needs to explain to Forever 21’s clientele that wearing a shirt that says “LOVE” on it actually kind of makes it look like you have the opposite values of what you think it does. These may as well say “WORDS. THESE ARE WORDS.” or “I AM A HUMAN WHO HAS THOUGHTS IN MY BRAIN.” or “TAKE A PICTURE OF ME SMOKING A CIGARETTE AGAINST A...
25 Things I'll Never Do
1. make out with Nick Kroll 2. dunk a basketball on a regulation hoop w/o magic shoes 3. bomb a school 4. join a sorority (Brotherhood of Man O.K.) 5. tip a cab driver with confidence 6. win a gold medal for vault 7. order calamari 8. see pre-voice change Bieber in concert 9. fall through the ice 10. eat a whole sheet cake 11. sign The Declaration of Independence 12. man-gina 13....
get the fuck ready
It’s gonna get raw, it’s gonna get salty, and you know it’s gonna get sexy.